Friday, March 20, 2009

Do one thing a day that scares you...not 500!

My brother Max thought he would be a good older brother and find me a job, luck fell upon us and one of his patients just so happened to be a farmer that was looking for some people to drive his combines. My brother told him about me and poof I got the job. So Luke (my boss) came to pick me up at 6:00 am March 15th. Now I must add, when I was told about the job they said that we would be doing some over night jobs, but they pay for everything food, hotel the works, so I agreed. Little did I know that my first job was 3 days long. When I got in his truck that fateful day and he pointed to the foam in the back seat and said "thats your bed" I almost started crying on the spot. I asked him if we were picking up anyone else, he said no, and we had 3 hours to go till we got to the field. So off we went just me and my good old buddy Luke. About 15 min into the drive BOOM we hit a kangaroo..... on my side!!! You would have thought that the hit would have been a good conversation starter but other than some foul language on his part, you would have thought it never happened. No more that 10 min later BANG we hit a wild turkey that smashed in the front window (on his side) and once again nothing. Other than the glass flying threw the car and some VERY foul language on his part again NOTHING it didn't even come up in conversation. I was trying to control myself from laughing at him so  I looked out my window and pinched my leg so hard to stop from laughing! (later i looked and there was a bruise)  We continued driving but he had to lean over to look through the passenger side of the truck... it was not awkward or uncomfortable..... not one bit! 
We made a stop at one of his friends houses to get something while we were there I pulled out my cell phone to see if I could get some service. There I was in a pink shirt, shorts, a big flower bag, pink cell phone and my big white sun glasses with about 5 Australian farmers. After I came to the sad reality that I was not going to get service I went over to the truck where they were all talking..... it was silent for a moment and one of them said "wow you just fit right in here don't you" 
At last we got to the farm where we would be picking up the combine to take to the field. While we were there a man (about 6.1, 300 pounds, big old hat and a THICK accent) said we could sleep in the farm house. I turned to look at it but all i could see was a shed. After unpacking all the stuff out of the truck into the "farm house" we headed down to the field to get started. Luke said to me "Ang you hop in the truck and i will direct you on the 2 way radio" So i got in the truck that was pulling a trailer, stick shift, smashed in window AND I have never driven on the other side of the road before. READY SET JUMP! 
I don't know how I managed but after stalling only 4 times, accidentally leaving the park break on and driving on the wrong side of the high way twice, I lived.
 This day just did not want to end. But when we were done at the field we headed into town where we should have a beer at the local pub and just "relax" I really fit in with my pink shirt and coke with a straw (picture it) 
The climax of this tragic tail was when we got back to the "farm house"  Peter (Lukes old man about 5.5 skinny 3 maybe 4 front teeth) pulled a towel out of his backpack and handed it to me "Here Ang you can go take a shower" I almost started crying I held it together until I got into the bathroom. The Tub was covered in dead flies and a cockroach was crawling around the drain, the sink had a spider-web covering half of t, and I swear I heard a frog in the toilet. Luke had told me there was soap in the shower and when I saw it that was the end; I started dry heaving and ran to my "room" to get my camera. I was crying/laughing!! The soap was about 10 bars all used and stuck together with bugs and crap covering the dish. You pick up one and you pick up all. I could not force myself to shower so I just turned the tap on with a square of TP and ran the water for 10 min standing outside the shower trying not to breath in the smell of the water. ( it smelt like cow poop) So there I was in what I thought was the closest thing you could get to a "beef sauna" wishing I could tap my heals and GO HOME .... but sadly I am not Dorthy. 
To be Continued....

11 comments:

  1. I am dying and crying right now and I have already heard the entire story. And personally I don't know what's wrong with a beef sauna it sounds great! and I am just wondering who spell checked this for you cause you never use capital letters or punctuation...Love you and miss you

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  2. oh my heck. i laughed through this entire thing! only you can tell a story like that! i hope you had the chance to shower since then!

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  3. MAN you have a talent in blogging! I LOVE EWE.

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  4. okay so jack said to read this and lucky for me I got a good ab workout. Sounds like you follow the adventures, or maybe they follow you. I can't wait for this to be continued!! Ps did they pay well?

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  5. jack-o i did it all on my own proud? ok mell did ..i am lame
    Jessie B i miss social we told some good stores there ...poop i love ewe to you little perv...oh how i miss you!
    Britt i will tell you the rest of it but i have to force myself to remember it all...tear tear

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  6. Ang, I am killing myself laughing, Lola came over and joined me laughing equally as hard!!! This is hilarious!!! My poor dear, I hope Luke pays well. I'm a little obsessed with your humor and wording I feel like I was there with you. Thank you for this, best laugh I've had all day! I miss you, even though we barely saw each other when you were on this continent I swear miss you more now

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  7. i don't even know where to start. that is so stinkin hilarious, i wish i could have seen your face through it all. i still can't believe you live in aust and have to drive on the other side of the road.

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  8. oh...my...gooness! ang that is the funniest/scariest story i have ever heard! i would have done the same thing with the shower but probably passed out from the smell and overwhelming sight of bugs everywhere - gross!!! you are making some serious memories over there girl - good work :)

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  10. Olivia i tried to get to your blog but i am a little slow and didn't know how to do it! but i just have to say i feel the same i feel like we have this amazing little friendship .... must be the blood lol and i am nothing but flattered that you enjoy my humor i have a little story for you... one day i was with my friend tina and i said something that she found to be funny she looked at me and said "ang what movie is that off" i said nothing it was just me ..she looked at me and said " OH MY GOSH i just realized that you are funny.." it hurt a little that she just realized it but we got threw it together and are still friends.I will keep you all posted on what i do with this life of mine as long as you all keep my posted on yours love and miss you all I FEEL EVERY FAR AWAT FROM HOME

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  11. oh my I think you are getting some adventures girl glad its you and not me you handle it way better then I would and I would probably kill my brother ha ha! BUt you are hilarious The shower sounds beyond disgusting!!

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